A Teacher's Nightmare

Part 1

© 1999 by Sailor Jade (evil scout of the Negaverse)

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"Amethyst!" Jedite roared, "Where are you?"

Faint giggling was heard from around a pillar. Jedite ran towards it just in time to feel the effect of a magical teleport.

Jedite swore. Out of all the new candidates to be trained for becoming a general why did he have to get *her*!

"Got ya Jeddy!" a cheerful voice said, tackling Jedite to the ground. His face hit the rough gravel before he knew it.

"Damn it, Amethyst!" Jedite shouted pushing the black-haired girl off the back, "Why do you have to do that!?"

Amethyst giggled and jumped into the air. "'Cause it's fun!"

Jedite shook his head and grabbed Amethyst by the wrist. "We're going to finish that practice even if it kills you!"

"Or maybe I'll kill you first," Amethyst chirped.

Jedite pushed the girl in front of a target, "Hit the target," he said angrily.

"Why should I?" Amethyst said turning her nose in the air, "It never did anything to me! Well maybe to you with that attitude..."

"Just do it!" Jedite shouted.

"Temper, temper, Jedite," Malicite's voice said from behind him.

Jedite exhaled slowly and turned around, a fake smile on his lips. "Malicite, what a surprise."

"Hi Malicite!" Amethyst yelled jumping up and down while waving. "Jedite was just about to make me hit the target!"

Jedite slapped himself on the forehead, now Malicite would insist that he had to watch and then report how bad a job he was doing. This just wasn't his week...

Malicite laughed. "You couldn't hit the rim if your life depended on it!" Malicite said smugly.

Amethyst's face turned the same color as her ruby red lips. "That's not true!" she shouted back.

Malicite disappeared then reappeared inches away from Amethyst's face. Amethyst jerked back in surprise. "I think I should teach you a lesson that you should respect the higher ranking officers," he growled.

"Malicite..." Jedite warned. He knew what was going to happen next if Malicite didn't watch it...

"Shut up, Jedite!" Malicite snapped. He grabbed Amethyst by the front of her jacket with one hand and pulled her up to his eye level. Amethyst's eyes were glowing faintly. Jedite ducked behind a pillar for safety. Malicite raised one hand, a ball of energy appeared in it. He raised the ball and...

A sonic boom of pure purple-tinted energy flew the room. Jedite peered around the pillar and saw that as usual Amethyst stood with her victim at her feet.

Amethyst bent down and grabbed Malicite up by the front of his jacket. "Where's your god now?" she growled quoting some human movie that she loved to watch. She threw Malicite aside and he quickly teleported away.

Jedite, after making sure it was safe, walked out of his hiding place that was the pillar. He shook his head. Add Malicite to the list of people who learned the hard way not to get Amethyst mad...

* * *

"Ahhhhhhhh! I'm going to be late!" a blond with a very strange hair-do cried running down the street. "Luna why didn't you wake me!"

"I did!" a black cat insisted. "You said you were getting up!"

"And you believed me?" The girl whose name was Serena asked. Serena rounded a corner and ran into a girl with long black hair. They both fell to the ground.

"Hey!" the other girl shouted, "Watch where you're going!"

"Sorry!" Serena cried jumping to her feet, she pulled the black-haired girl to her feet. Serena studied the girl with rising interest. She had waist-length black hair that had been braided and wrapped in a purple ribbon. The girl had violet eyes that were staring back at Serena. Just then Serena noticed the uniform that she wore. "Hey you go to my school!" Serena shouted.

Amethyst took a step back from the crazy human girl. "School? I don't go to your school."

"Yes you do!" Serena laughed, "Your wearing the same uniform that I am!"

Amethyst paled. <I knew I shouldn't of copied my outfit off of that red head!> "I don't know what your talking about."

"You must be new here!" Serena said, "Oh, you're the perfect excuse!"


"If Miss H. asks where I was I can say, 'I was showing around the new girl!'"

Amethyst took several steps backward, "I had better be going..."

A bell rang in the distance. "Oh no!" Serena yelled, "We're going to be late!"

"Late? For what?!"

"Come on!" Serena grabbed Amethyst's hand and set off at top speed for the school.

<I have a bad feeling about that girl,> Luna thought trailing the two. <I better check it out.>

* * *

Amethyst's eyes were dancing with happiness as she looked around the room that the strange girl had taken her. All the kids in the room were her age! Well close enough to it. They were only off by a hundred or so.

"Hey guys! Look at what I just got off the Internet!" a dorky looking guy with glasses said proudly holding up some computer printed pictures of a young girl with long blond hair wearing a short outfit.

"Oh cool!" Amethyst said taking a closer look. All the kids were looking at her strangely, but if she pretended to be interested in what they liked maybe she could make a friend. She was awfully lonely when she was in the Negaverse. Amethyst stared at the picture a few more minutes. "Who is she?"

The small group of kids that had crowded around the picture turned and stared at Amethyst. "You don't know who Sailor V is?" one asked.

Amethyst took a step back, being intimidated by their stares and not wanting to use her powers, she didn't attack. "No, should I have?"

"Sailor V is the coolest, greatest, most awesome super hero around!" the blonde cheered.

"Yeah," a red head said from next to the blonde, "She lives in England and helps the police catch bank robbers!"

"She does?" Amethyst stared at the picture. Could a human really do that?

"She has super powers, too!" the dorky boy exclaimed.

Amethyst's interest perked. A human with super powers wasn't possible, but if it was that meant she might just have a chance to make friends and have someone to relate with. "What sort of powers?" she asked.

"She has an energy chain that she uses to tie them up, then after the police capture them it just disappears," a voice said from behind Amethyst. She whirled around to see a young girl with short blue hair standing there.

"She sounds really cool," Amethyst said turning back to the picture, "Does anyone know who she really is?"

"No, of course not!" the red head laughed.

"Oh," Amethyst said disappointed, "Hey, um, um, what are you guys' names anyway?"

"Oh, have we been that rude?" the blue-haired girl asked, "I'm Amy. These are my friends, Serena, Molly, and Melvin," each person nodded as their name was said.

"Hi, I'm..."

"Sorry I'm late class!" a red-haired woman said rushing into the room.

Amethyst jerked back in shock. <Queen Beryl?>

"Go on up," Molly whispered pushing her toward the teacher.

"Uh, sure," Amethyst said shakily as she walked up to the desk. The teacher was going through some papers on her desk. "Excuse me," Amethyst said quietly. The teacher didn't even pay attention. "I said excuse me," she said louder. The teacher treated her like she was invisible. "I said excuse me!" Amethyst shouted.

Papers flew everywhere and the teacher fell to the floor. "Don't ever do that again!" she shouted.

"Well you weren't paying any attention!" Amethyst yelled staring at the teacher. She could out-stare anybody in the Negaverse, she could easily beat her.

As Amethyst expected the teacher looked away. "I suppose I wasn't paying much attention. What did you want?"

Amethyst smiled inwardly. She had this teacher wrapped around her little finger. "I'm new."

"Oh," Miss H. mumbled. "What's your name?"

"Uh...Ammy," she said silently cursing herself for using that stupid nickname of hers.

"What's your last name?" Miss H. asked flipping through some papers on her desk.

"Last name?" Amethyst asked nervously, she glanced around the room looking for something, anything to give her an idea. Her eyes fell on a map and she quickly picked out a country, "Zaira."

"I don't see you on the list of new students," Miss H. said dropping the papers in a neat pile.

Amethyst twitched her fingers, a purple glow formed over the stack. Amethyst hoped that no one noticed the glow. "Look again."

Miss H. frowned and shifted through the papers. At the bottom was a new piece freshly printed in purple ink. Miss H. stared at it. "I guess I missed this," she muttered. She extended her hand over the desk and I shook it warmly. "Welcome to Crossroads Jr. High."

Amethyst smiled.

* * *

Amethyst walked down the side walk humming a happy tune. A hand grabbed out of her from the shadows. It clasped around her mouth gagging her and yanked her back into the shadows. Amethyst tried to scream only to feel the hand close tighter around her.

"Will you shut up?" Jedite's voice growled.

"Medrht?" Amethyst said. Well, she meant to say 'Jedite', but his hand muffled her words. He finally released her. "Jeeze, Jedite. What are you doing here?"

"The more important question is what are *you* doing here?" he snapped, giving her an annoyed look.

"I'm...uh... working up a secret identity."

"I believe that," Jedite said sarcastically, "You decided all of a sudden to come to the Earth Realm and start a secret identity so that you can pretend to befriend a Sailor Scout then crush them."

"Well, sort of..."

"That's the most ridiculous lie I have ever heard!"

"I found out some information about a Sailor Scout!" Amethyst almost shouted. Jedite stared at her. "Her name is Sailor V. She lives in England and is the only one there. She doesn't fight youmas, she fights bank robbers and human villains. She has movies, comic books, the works out about her, everyone knows about her though no one knows *her*. People have taken pictures of her..." she handed the picture of Sailor V to Jedite that she stole from Melvin, "... she could most probably be a Sailor Scout."

"Of what planet?" Jedite asked annoyed that Amethyst had found more information out about a possible Sailor Scout in hours then he'd found in days. "She can't be a *Sailor* Scout without a planet."

"Since when does the word Sailor have to do with the planets?"

Jedite shrugged. "I don't know, but Queen Beryl insists that all Sailor Scouts are named after planets."

"How about Venus? It starts with a V."

Jedite sighed, <She's smarter than I thought.>

"Ammy!" an annoying voice called. Jedite and Amethyst turned and saw Molly, Serena, and Amy running up towards them.

"Oh, hi guys," Amethyst said a fake smile on her face. Jedite noted that she increased the deepness to her voice so it sounded different. A trick he'd have to use more often.

"Hey, whose the cute guy?" Serena asked, hearts forming in her eyes as she caught sight of Jedite.

Jedite cursed inwardly. He was hoping not to have to be drawn in and be able to teleport quietly away, now that those giggly human girls had spotted him, he didn't have a chance. Jedite stepped into the light so it didn't look like he was trying to hide, still making sure that his face was in shadow. If one of these girls were the Sailor Scouts he didn't want them to recognize him.

"He's...my cousin...Jed. He's my cousin Jed from out of the country," Amethyst quickly said. She gave Jedite a glance that begged him to follow the story.

"Hello," 'Jed' said quietly and meekly, trying to act like a shy little boy.

"He's a hunk!" Serena drooled.

Jedite and Amethyst exchanged a stressed glance. What were these humans talking about?

"Yeah," Molly continued acting like he wasn't there, "He is so dreamy!"

Amethyst almost burst out laughing when she realized what they were talking about. "You think Jeddy over there is cute!? Something is so wrong with your minds!"

Jedite, Serena, and Molly all gave Amethyst a death glare as she dropped into hysterics. "What's so funny about them thinking I'm attractive?!" Jedite growled.

"Only that you're a creep, a no brained jerk, and just pure evil." Amy and Serena exchanged a worried glance at that comment.

"What does the pure evil part mean?" Jedite demanded, trying to act like he didn't know what she was talking about.

"Who was the one who put a stink bomb under the teachers desk in third grade?" Amethyst asked.

Jedite flushed. How did she know about that? "Zoey came up with the idea."

"Who put a frog in the coffee pot?"

<Queen Beryl threw a fit for almost a month.> "Neph caught the frog."

"Who was it that stole some test papers and then set them on fire in the playground while jumping around and singing that you were going to be able to get a private teacher and called all the rest of kids 'suckers' until you were dragged away by the principal and then realized that you got a stick in the mud?!"

"That was you."

"It was? Oh yeah... We're both pure evil!" Amethyst laughed evilly.

"You're not evil, you're insane!" Jedite pointed out. Serena, Amy, and Molly just stared at the two crazy people in front of them.

"Evil. Insane. There's no difference. I'm evil and insane!"

Jedite shook his head once again wondering why he had to get her as his student. "Come on we have to get home," he finally said.

Amethyst pouted. "Do we have to?"




"Oh, all right," she turned to the three girls that were still staring at them, "I have to go," she muttered angrily.

"That's really to bad, Ammy," Amy said recovering first, "I wanted to have a talk about the wonders of mathematics."

'Ammy' smiled and started to walk away. "Sounds like... fun. I'll see you guys tomorrow!"

Jedite, getting impatient grabbed Amethyst's wrist and dragged her around a corner where he teleported them both away.

Back around the corner Molly was shaking her head. "What a strange family," she commented.

Amy nodded her head in agreement.

"Hey you guys, let's get some ice cream!" Serena shouted.

"I thought you didn't have any money left," Molly said following Serena down the side walk.

"That's right! Maybe I'll run into Raye and she'll lend me some money!"

"The probability of that is 30,000 to 1."

"Your not helping, Amy!"

* * *

"That was *so much fun*!" Amethyst screeched when she and Jedite got back to the Negaverse.

"I don't believe you did that!" Jedite roared angrily. "How could you be so stupid to try something like that!?"

Amethyst looked smug as she answered. "Well, I found out more information in seven hours then you did in seven weeks! What does that say for who's stupid and who's not?"

"What information?" Zoicite asked appearing. Malicite was not there, he probably didn't want to be near Amethyst for a while.

"On who could be a potential Sailor Scout," Amethyst boasted.

"Really?" Zoicite asked interestedly, "I don't think you did."

"I did!" insisted Amethyst.

"Then who is it?"

"Sailor...mumh!" before Amethyst could finish her sentence Jedite clamped his hand over her mouth for the second time that day.

"What are you trying to do? Let Malicite and Zoicite take the credit?" Jedite hissed. "You'll find out when Queen Beryl finds out, and that's when we have more proof." Zoicite scowled and teleported away. Jedite sighed in relief. "Now since you skipped class for the day you have to make it up now," he informed Amethyst as he released her.

Amethyst groaned. "But I found out all that information!"

"You skipped class. Now I want you to hit those targets five times each in the bull's eye."

"Ahh man!" Amethyst complained as she turned to some targets that had appeared. Jedite smiled, he still had some control over her.

* * *

"Please, Raye! I have to have some ice cream!"

"No way Serena, you already owe me 2000 yen, I want to get that back before anything else!"

"Please, please, please!"


Amethyst smiled. There was Serena, and Amy, and Molly along with a girl she didn't know. From the conversation it sounded like her name was Raye. Amethyst checked her outfit and frowned. Serena and the others weren't dressed like her anymore. Amethyst stepped into an alley and with magic changed her cloths into a purple jacket, a white shirt, and blue jeans. Amethyst smiled happily, she would go in, try and make at least one friend and leave before Jedite missed her. Life was good. Amethyst took a deep breath and walked into the room. "Hi Serena."

"Huh? Oh hi, Ammy," Serena said turning around. A greedy look came into Serena's eye. "Hey, Ammy, do have any money?"

'Ammy' laughed. "I could hear the conversation from across the street. You want ice cream and your friend doesn't want to lend you the money."

"Yes, but you're a much nicer friend aren't you?"

Amethyst laughed again. She had already made a friend and she hadn't even been in there 5 minutes! "I'm pure evil, remember?"

"Just because you stole some test papers... and set them on fire... and called the other kids names doesn't mean that... you're right, you are evil!"

Amethyst laughed evilly. "I'm worse then evil! I'm the new, original, Count Dracula! Vvhhaa! I shall suck your blood and change you into one of my own kind! I also enjoy changing into a bat, planting flowers, and looking at the stars."

The raven-haired shook her head. "Where do you find all these wakko friends?" she demanded.

"Raye!" Amy scolded, "She's new. It isn't her fault that she decided to make friends with Serena."

"And what is that supposed to mean?" Amethyst asked giving Amy an annoyed look.

"Nothing!" Amy quickly said.

"So, Ammy, do you have any money?" Serena asked changing the subject back.

Amethyst laughed. "Of course I do!" she giggled pulling out some conjured yen, "Here."

Serena stared at the money Amethyst given her. "Wow! This is enough to buy ten ice creams!"

Amethyst smiled pleased with herself. "I gave you so much because then you wouldn't have to continue to beg for money, *plus* I expect you to get me an ice cream too."

"Sure!" Serena chirped, "What do you want?"

Amethyst shrugged, "Surprise me."

Serena skipped away happily and Raye turned her attention to Amethyst. "So you're new here?"

Amethyst didn't like the look on Raye's face. "Uh, yeah."

Raye leaned in closer. "So where did you come from before you moved here?"

Amethyst leaned back trying to get away from Raye. "I came from... America! Yeah, I came from the U.S.A. then my dad got a new job and we moved here."

"What about Jed?" Amy asked looking up from a book.

"Yes what about Jed?" Raye asked in the same suspicious manner.

"He... came with us. He's... looking for a new job in Tokyo. He's staying with us until he gets a place of his own and a job."

Raye scowled, she was getting bad vibes from Ammy, but so far she had gotten reasonable answers from her. "So where do you live?"

Amethyst paled noticeably. "I live..."

"Ammy!" a deep voice growled. Raye turned to see a tall man with short blond hair glaring at her. No, he was staring at Ammy who had shrank to a few inches in seconds.

"Hi Jed, what are you doing here?" Amethyst stammered.

"The question is, what are you doing here?"

If Raye was getting bad vibes from Ammy she was getting really bad vibes from Jed. "So you're Ammy's cousin?" Raye asked smugly. "You really seem to be mad about Ammy seeing her friends."

'Ammy' shook her head widely, she waved her hands trying to get Raye's attention and stop her from getting 'Jed' mad.

"Yeah, so? I have a good reason to be mad."

"What may that be? She didn't get your school uniform pressed?"

Jedite glared at her angrily. "She left in the middle of her practice. Aunt Bette was most displeased.

"Aunt Bette? Who's that, your grandma's sister?"

Before Jedite could blow up in Raye's face, Amethyst stepped in between the two. "What a nice conversation, but Jed, I think that we really have to go. Aunt Bette will be even more unpleased if we wait."

Jedite nodded, still glaring at Raye. He bowed to her stiffly. "I hope to never see you again," he said in a fake pleasant voice.

Raye plastered a fake smile on her face. "If I ever see you again it will be too soon," she replied pleasantly.

Jedite clenched his fists. "I'll see you in..."

"Why don't we go now?" Amethyst ordered more then asked as she pulled Jedite away from Raye.

"Hey, Ammy. What do you want me to do with your sundae?" Serena asked returning to the table.

"Keep it," Amethyst simply said. "I don't think Aunt Bette will enjoy the thought of my having an ice cream."

"A health freak?" Serena asked wincing.

"Yeah, you could say th..."

"Let's go, Ammy!" Jed said impatient. He dragged Amethyst out before she could say another word.

Author's Notes:

I wrote this while I was home sick so I wasn't thinking straight. Pity me, ok? This story was intended to be a humor fanfic but ended on a serious note. So sue me.


Sailor Moon doesn't belong to me (though I wish she did) she belongs to DIC and every one else that deals with her. The annoying brat Amethyst does belong to me I made her up myself. Incredible huh? 'Nuff said.

The End of Part 1 - Goto Part 2

Author's Note:

I don't know what moved me to write this story, maybe it was because I wanted to or because I wanted to use one of the Jedite quotes that I've been collecting. In case anyone can't tell I'm a Jedite freak. I think he's the coolest of the generals though many of you think otherwise. Oh well, at least I don't have to worry about an ice crystal in my back from one of Zoicite's temper tantrums when he finds out that you're dating his beloved. Good luck to all you Kunzite or Malicite lovers.

Disclaimer: Sailor Moon doesn't belong to me, she never will, and I don't have a hope that someday I'll be able to use her name freely. 'Nuff said.

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